80 is the new 50

Your not old Gary, your only as old as you feel. 80 is the new 50. 
Reality check, I have arthritis spreading through my body. My shoulders and hips hurt most of the time. My back aches badly just getting out of a chair. I find just making coffee annoying sometimes. It takes me twice as long to motivate to get going. My hair is almost gone, my teeth are becoming history. I have to sleep 10 hours a day now instead of 8. I still have to work everyday, though I really do not want to. I have had people I knew drop before the age I am now that I can count on both hands twice.
I see those 20 years younger with debilitating diseases. Cancer,VD, and more.
I know what I felt like when I was 50 versus today. Age is a variable for all of us. Some live to 90 or above without real pain. Most do not. But the most aggravating things people say to me is-Oh your not old. I know what I am. I have young women who denigrate me everyday by calling me honey. Thinking they are cute. But diminishing my strengths. Young men who perceive an easy target for a quick score. The reality is that yes I am old. That doesn't mean I will lie down and be trampled by a society that idolizes youth. It doesn't mean that I will just go away. It means I am what I am, and will continue on until I am called. But at least do me the dignity of not denigrating my image based on your perceptions of old age. I have done many good things and reached many many people over the years. I deserve others "respect" I feel I have earned it.

Success What Is It?

Have you ever wondered why "successful" people wind up hooked on drugs or alcohol? They seem to have everything one could want. An ability to go where they want, eat want they want, do what they want and when. Yet lots of lotto millionaires wind up totally broke and in trouble. I think it stems from a human desire to always expect or demand something new, something different. I am rich so I deserve the best. I will yell, scream and cry to get my way, I am owed that because I am wealthy and deserve it. I have been up and I have been down. At one time I made lots of money, much more than I really needed. I also have been very down as I have related here before. My grand father who was a fairly wealthy man, would always shoot me little pieces of his wisdom. His main one "everything in moderation Gary" . Probably the best advise I have ever got. There were times in my life when I didn't listen to that advise, and wound up in trouble. At one time I diagnosed OJ Simpsons car. That white Bronco that became so famous. He had it all, a beautiful wife and home in the Hollywood Hills. Today he is in prison over dumb shit, and has lost everything. Though hardly rich, today I am secure, happy, productive and free. Some of the happiest people I have known have the least, you seldom see Buddhist monks or Catholic priests walking around frowning. The joy of life, and successful living comes from accepting what we have, finding simple joys everyday,and taking nothing for granted. I have been fortunate to have traveled some, seen things that few have seen. But I have a gut feeling that if I did that everyday, it would not have the impact of "special" that it does in my mind. I have learned to accept that sometimes life is boring, That I really should never get everything I might want, and that some suffering is good-for the heart, the mind and ones soul. Everyday I work for others who right now, have more than I do. Yet they look to me sometimes to brighten them up, or make there day a tiny bit better. They have created so much complexity in their life, that finding happiness eludes them. They start to drink hard or do drugs and then slide into a form of oblivion that often times they never get out of. Instead of wishing you were rich, try thinking smaller. Some of the happiest times in my life were really simple, like just playing cards with my great grand mother. Or rowing an old rowboat across a lake. You do not have to be rich to be happy. Just be grateful for what you do have. And smile with the knowledge that yes, God Does Love You. -Gary

Complete The Circle

Everyone irregardless of age, has different sides to them, there is the business side, the personal side, the spiritual side, and the inner self. If you pick one and judge, you went straight and drove off the road instead of following the curve and completing the circle.

Cranky Old Man

One of the things I realize now as "an old man", is that the things I did years ago, are not something I should try to be doing today. My patience has thinned, I lose my temper sometimes when it seems "irrational" . I have far less energy, have to sleep more to just feel normal. I have always loved children, but now find them "more than I can handle" sometimes. I accept what I have become, even if some people do not like it. Growing old is something everyone has to go through, if they survive. If your parent seems crotchety when you bring your kids to see them. It doesn't mean they do not love them, or you. It means they are different now, in a way they maybe don't like themselves. Forgive them. We Are Human.

Crazy Eyes

Your flipping through the news, or walking down the street. You see someones photo or notice them talking. They say that the eyes are the gateway to the soul. I have found this to be true. There is a sort of bulge or look in some. I call it crazy eyes. Like there is no soul behind the gleam. Charles Manson had this kind of look. When you encounter this type of individual, If your empathic at all. You feel a coldness, a strong sense of evil and foreboding. It is enough to make you almost feel sick, you cross the street trying to stay as far away as you can. They seem to radiate a type of evil in their thinking and often times actions, it makes you want to run. Many religions talk about possession, or being possessed by demons. Minions of the under world who reek havoc on earth. There are hearts that have nothing but evil in them. They have no compassion, never try to understand. Actions from them are as cruel as cruel can be. Some will say it is a product of a bad childhood. Or that they never stood a chance. If you believe in Christianity you are told in the bible that demons walk among us. People possessed by the devil causing pain and suffering. Lots of people say this is a myth, and not true. I have found the opposite. I have watched murder and mayhem. Seen the actions of these demons among us. Felt there power. And then turned my back. Facing the light is the most wonderful feeling I have ever had. It has brightened my spirit and enlightened my mind. Opened doors that had remained closed. Allowed me to feel and think in ways I doubted. It is ok that there are demons among us. The key is learning when you must cross the street.-Gary,

I Just Called To Say I Love You

As a geek, with a computer which allows me to do 20 things at the same time, I appreciate Facebook for it's design. Over 35 years I have used hundreds of systems for storing and transmitting data. Tabs is an awesome advance. lets me work my profile and pages in 3 different directions at once. It's not perfect, I would love the ability to use html or java script. I tend to stop sharing at 5 to 10 each day. Overload is a real thing. For the user and the sharer. Even when I want to "keep going" smile emoticon .
Even a blind man, benefits from today's computers. It's an amazing and awesome achievement . Why I Thank Bill Gates,Steve Jobs, And Yea Mark Zukerman.
"I Just Called To Say I Love You" 

Eugenics And The Act of Playing God

Every rational mind knows that over population is a bad thing for the world.
Less resources, more disease, fewer choices.
Or is it?-we define success in nature as the propagation of a species.
The more successful species encompass a larger area, breed more, and propagate more. So where is the right answer?. If a hungry man says to me please help me. And I can-I help him. That is my nature. Is that a bad thing? Every religion guides us towards helping our fellow man. To try and ease pain and suffering. Who is to say that a Greater Plan, one deemed worthy doesn't come from a power higher than ourselves.
One which takes into account millennia, not just moments. What gives a few the right to decide how we as moral people should allocate resources or medical help. Who said that hospitals "must" be profitable. Mass suffering in the past has created better medicines, better health techniques, created in the minds of many a real desire to solve the problems of humanity. With no incentive of a moral nature-would we have that sort of human progress? We as people tend to grow by need. We as humans are impelled to be problem solvers. If there are no problems, there is nothing to solve and no need or interest in personal and scientific growth. No one ever promised that life would be utopian. So why should we think that logic should over ride our moral nature, that suffering needs to be eliminated through eugenics instead of the fundamental belief that all men have the capacity for good and are valuable unto themselves. Who gave someone with wealth the right to become our moral compass? Certainly not I. and probably not you. Corporations and people of wealth need to stop playing God. It's a battle they can never win. They will die and become a simple memory. There impact is but a blip in time. Eternity is something best determined by an immortal God-not a mortal human.-Gary,

Gary Graefen: On Kindness

I tried to be nice to you,

You saw something ugly and then turned away,

I took back my kindness,

and then walked away.


Simple acts of kindness are exactly that.

Stop looking for ulterior motives.

From those whose only desire is to hope you are happy.

40 years ago, about this time of year I was homeless, lost and starving. Sleeping in an old van at night. Trying desperately to find work by day. After 13 days of not eating I expected to die. One evening I found an old knife, and saw a man walking on the other side of the street. I decided that I was going to rob him and take his wallet. I started to cross the street towards him. Half way there I threw the knife, broke down, fell to my knees in the middle of the street and cried God why is this happening please help me. I left and feel asleep. The very next day a person I knew pounded on the Van and yelled Graefen come on, I think you got a job. I walked 3 miles to meet a man named Joe Birkin. He hired me that day, looked at me and said you don't have any money do you Gary. I said no, I don't. He didn't really even know me yet but said, here I am going to give you $100 in advance and i'll take it out of your pay later over time. Clean up and be here tomorrow. I felt rich and lucky and blessed. I thanked God that day. And ate like a pig smile emoticon Today I still remember, God answers when your heart and mind are in the right place. God Bless You.

More On Living With Hope

Have you ever wondered why "successful" people wind up hooked on drugs or alcohol? They seem to have everything one could want. An ability to go where they want, eat want they want, do what they want and when. Yet lots of lotto millionaires wind up totally broke and in trouble. I think it stems from a human desire to always expect or demand something new, something different. I am rich so I deserve the best. I will yell, scream and cry to get my way, I am owed that because I am wealthy and deserve it.
I have been up and I have been down. At one time I made lots of money, much more than I really needed. I also have been very down as I have related here before. My grand father who was a fairly wealthy man, would always shoot me little pieces of his wisdom. His main one "everything in moderation Gary" . Probably the best advise I have ever got. There were times in my life when I didn't listen to that advise, and wound up in trouble.
At one time I diagnosed OJ Simpsons car. That white Bronco that became so famous. He had it all, a beautiful wife and home in the Hollywood Hills. Today he is in prison over dumb shit, and has lost everything. Though hardly rich, today I am secure, happy, productive and free.
Some of the happiest people I have known have the least, you seldom see Buddhist monks or Catholic priests walking around frowning.

 The joy of life, and successful living comes from accepting what we have, finding simple joys everyday,and taking nothing for granted. I have been fortunate to have traveled some, seen things that few have seen. But I have a gut feeling that if I did that everyday, it would not have the impact of "special" that it does in my mind. I have learned to accept that sometimes life is boring, That I really should never get everything I might want, and that some suffering is good-for the heart, the mind and ones soul.
Everyday I work for others who right now, have more than I do. Yet they look to me sometimes to brighten them up, or make there day a tiny bit better. They have created so much complexity in their life, that finding happiness eludes them. They start to drink hard or do drugs and then slide into a form of oblivion that often times they never get out of. Instead of wishing you were rich, try thinking smaller. Some of the happiest times in my life were really simple, like just playing cards with my great grand mother. Or rowing an old rowboat across a lake. You do not have to be rich to be happy. Just be grateful for what you do have. And smile with the knowledge that yes, God Does Love You.
-Gary

What It Means To Be Free

Today I was sitting here, thinking about what was, what is, and what is yet to come.
About lost friends, lost loves, lost people.
The ever growing agony of war abroad, intolerance and hatred.
How some fear taking a trip to the market, or a family outing to a park.
Or just going to work to earn a living so ones family can eat everyday and have shelter, clean water or electricity, or the simple freedom to say what they feel or believe what they want.

Everyday someone in America burns a flag, protests in the street, rails at a leader, or screams at a citizen.

But the reality is that I never fear a trip to the grocery where I can buy what I choose. I manage to earn a living, mostly in peace. I have always fed my family, and enjoyed the places of peace in our parks and forests.
When I have chosen, I have moved to where I wanted to live, changed jobs, or learned what I wanted to learn.

Though with faults and tribulations,
Some pain and grief,

I still am lucky, proud to call myself an American.
And though many might find constant fault.
I am still here to write and talk and share.

I am alive when thousands have fallen long before their time.

Thank you America, for allowing me to be free.

Ning Network Users Don't Matter !

I seldom rail, at 61 I have seen it all on the internet.
   I owned a bulletin board system before the internet even existed. But if I have learned anything at all it's that the user matters. Several years ago I signed up for a Ning network. Worked very hard creating my system, uploading files,creating a user base. Just WORKING HARD, to make something viable. Suddenly Ning in it's ultimate wisdom decided that they had to charge for a Ning social network system. Sure I was offered the opportunity to now pay them, but if I did not-all my hard work would vanish. Which is exactly what happened. Hours and hours of labor and thousands of users now just GONE!. Oh yes, I was upset, but what was I to do?. Then a bit latter I encountered the Humanity Healing network. They paid Ning to setup. I thought ok I might not be able to have my own network, but at least I can have a profile. So again I spent hours creating a nice profile page, uploaded gillions of photos,added video,created my own images, and even uploaded files. So after about 1 month, suddenly my profile was in accessible. I was sent a note that I was considered a spammer. I never even sent out an email. Why was I a spammer?-because i linked to my blogs at Google, and linked to the files I had uploaded-with nings permission!-but they didn't like the bandwidth use. So AGAIn!--hours and hours of tedious build time-just vanished again. All my friends all my hard work gone overnight. I was fed UP with Humanity Healing, and The Ning network
     I said GOODBYE to ning! Well recently I received an email to join another new network called starseed. Evidently they had gotten my email from Humanity Healing and Ning. But I thought, ya know it's been along time. And I really did enjoy Nings system. Plus I managed to accumulate lots of users. So I joined starseed-Or Cosmic Nation. I spent an entire evening, uploading photos, creating a beautiful profile, putting in html, getting friends. The VERY NEXT DAY- MY NEW NETWORK PROFILE-vanished AGAIN! All my hours of work, gone. No ACCESS Evidently there was some sort of Issue between Humanity Healings admin and starseed about email address's. 2000 people had signed up in a matter of days-all lost their profiles, there uploads, and messages. AGAIN! after 5 years-The NING NETWORK and Humanity Healing cost me hours and hours of time and effort. And hundreds of accumulated friends. No compensation, No apology-Just f you! and goodbye. I have had Google Blogs for years and years, Had a free website for years and years. NEVER lost data or my user base. BUT EVERY SINGLE TIME-I have tried to use a Ning Network I have LOST EVERYTHING. And don't get me started about HUMANITY HEALING-there 502 status is a sham-they really do not care about there users AT ALL-and Both Ning and Humanity Healing have this NOW BACKWARD attitude about what spam is. With auto spam in every email system now-who cares? IT IS JUST AN EXCUSE TO DO AS THEY PLEASE-and screw you the user. So my advise to you? Stay AWAY from Ning Networks, Stay away from Humanity Healing Tired of my time and effort losses! They are a sham ! and NOT WORTH YOUR TIME Gary Graefen Jan. 2015